I must admit -- I don't know if I'd be on the bus had I "started" now. My experiences actually seeing the Dead (and arranging my lifestyle around being a Deadhead) are inextricable from my Coming of Age. Before I ever saw them, I had decided that the Dead would be my path from childhood to whatever adulthood was. Strange as it sounds, this came to me in a dream! I saw my first show at 15 in NY, chose Stanford so I could see them more, and kept up faithfully until '95, which was just about the time of my Saturn return. There is something that is "over" for me, but I'm afraid that something is my youth, not my dance with the Dead!
"Study as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow." -- Maria Mitchell
For these people you talked to - the band no longer does exist. They have decided to "move on" with their lives. I am living the same wonderful life full of colors, sounds, tastes, smells, and warmth that made me feel at home the first time I experienced it back in 1979. I enjoy not only reminecing the past experiences but also checking out those new incarnations which were influenced by this thing. This being the 40th anniversary of the summer of love, I would submit that the whole genre is still influencing and is very much alive. These very people, that you spoke with, may catch a second wind and just really feel it in the future. Maybe it is lost to them forever. For me I hope that it never dies.
I have an acute feeling that am extremely fortunate to have existed in the time capsule that I did to have been lucky enough to be there. In very much the same way that a classical lover would have felt who lived during Mozarts time. Those that loved and experienced Mozart's live performances, I am sure, savored and cherished their experiences all the days of their lives and for years beyond his death. We're still in awe.
Wake up and smell the roses. You experienced "grateness", don't be afraid to savor it.
I would submit that the experience for the band members was different from that of a deadhead who was not part of the inner 'working' circle. by 'working' circle, I mean those who made a living by somehow being employed by the Grateful Dead. I would also point out that most of the members had their own musical side projects going long before Jerry passed away. If not musical side projects, then they certainly had 'lives' or hobbies / interests separate from the band and separate from the music. don't we all? this is why I am still perplexed as to exactly what I am supposed to move on to? I am not trying to be obtuse here, but I still fail to see their (those that said move on with your life) point.
Bob Weir said something, when asked if he (and maybe Phil?) was going to keep on playing music, something like 'I'm not going to change who I am...' (a paraphrase)
Jerry also said a long time ago, something to the effect of 'if we (the grateful dead) are all you have, then you have nothing'
What we are doing with what the band left us is:
enjoying the music
sharing the music
sharing the experiences that once were
appreciating all things grateful
did I say? enjoying the music.
"....you're not wrong Walter, you're just an asshole!"
"What the fuck are you talking about?"
I think it kinda goes without saying that there were a lot of different experiences inside the big tie-dye tent. I also think that in the same way (as has been much remarked) one gets on the bus when one gets it and not a minute before, everybody has a different saturation point. So it's kinda not for me to say who did and didn't get it (though, believe me, I have as many opinions on the subject as the next Deadhead).
One point the people in question were making was, look, the surviving bandmembers have moved on. And also, paraphrasing Mickey, the fact that eventually we have to take what the band gave us and do something with it.
So I see their point of view, but I'm not willing to go along with this Over business exactly, either.
The legacy lives even if the band is no longer. This is why I am here, to connect with other like-minded people, who understand the feeling that was.
I am a baby in the eyes of some of the older folks who have been around a while. But still my life was touched by something that you could never explain to another person who was never there, this is why I am here, that connection that everyone felt at the shows, which is now making my hair stand up just thinking of, the community that always was there and just the shear overwhelming state of calm excitement that came over the audience when the first member walked out on stage.
I guess the folks that say "Get Over It" weren't touched in the same way that most of the people here seem to have been. The Dead were a way of life for a lot of us and a lot of us found our way after the loss of Jerry but there still is that emptiness that is sort of haunting.
Like the man at Laguna Seca Dayz after Jerry died, Bobby and the Boys started into Masterpiece and I was wandering around the vending area and came across a man just crying his eyes out and I just walked up to him and gave him a hug that lasted quite a while as he wept. Slowly he stopped crying and said thank you, we parted ways never introducing each other, but we knew we helped each other out, how can you give up that sort of community.
Reach out your hand if your cup be empty and if it's full may it be again.
Grateful Wishes to you and yours
it ain't over till we say its over!
get on with which part of my life??
with all due respect to a 'former' deadhead, fuck that.
what am I going to do? put on a fucking suit and tie and become the MAN?
what am I going to do? change my philosophy of life? -- which, ironically, includes respect for how others choose to live their lives...
so if one wishes to tell another to 'get on with their life', I'll politely listen and after I politely listen, I'll say, "fuck that" that is the NYC deadhead in me. ( -:
but it ain't none of my business how others choose to be or what they choose to do... it is called freedom of personal choice.
I really don't get their opinion... I really don't understand their point. what is over? the shows with Jerry? the shows with Brent? Vince? well shit, the shows with Keith and Donna, and Pig Pen were over long ago, too. What is over? the Grateful Dead as we once knew it?
as long as the music exists to sooth my soul, I will always be a deadhead and always be on the bus.
and it ain't like I don't listen to other music, I certainly do, always have always will. and it ain't like I don't go listen to other bands play, always have always will.
marye, what is their point? I really don't get it.
I would submit that some people who have left the dead in their wake, may never have really saw the light, or perhaps never really 'got it' . case by case, of course.