• Mama got the rub board, sister got the tub
    They're going round doing the rub-de-rub
    Ain't it crazy, ain't it crazy
    Ain't it crazy one day, to keep on rubbin' that thing

    Two old maids, they was layin' in a bed
    One turned over and this is what she said
    Ain't it crazy, ain't it crazy
    Ain't it crazy one day, to keep on rubbin' that thing

    Yeah mama killed a chicken, thought it was a duck
    Put him on the table with his feet sticking up
    [Alternative: ... with his feet turned up]
    Ain't it crazy, ain't it crazy
    Ain't it crazy one day, to keep on rubbin' that thing

    There was two old maids, layin' in the sand
    Each one wonderin' if the other was a man
    [Alternative: Each one wishing that the other was a man]
    Ain't it crazy, ain't it crazy
    Ain't it crazy one day, to keep on rubbin' at that thing

  • Go, bring me my shotgun, bring me back some shells
    Why don't you just bring me my shotgun
    Bring me back about a pocket full of shells
    Well you know if I don't get myself a little competition
    You know there's gonna be some trouble 'round here

    Well you know my mama told me, when I left my door
    She said, "you gonna have bad luck, son, don't care where you go"
    So why don't you bring me my shotgun
    Bring me back a pocket full of shells
    Well you know if I don't get myself a little competition
    You know there's gonna be some trouble 'round here

    Early in the morning when the sun gonna rise
    She's laying there rolling them old bloodshot eyes
    In the morning bring me my shotgun
    Well, I can stand any mess for a while
    But I can't stand it for very long

    Woke up this morning
    Found out some [jack strap?] had gone took my room
    Woke up this morning
    Found out some [jack strap?] had gone took my room
    Yeah you know he took along with it my woman
    That [jack strap?] going to meet his doom

    That's why I say bring me my shotgun, boy
    I want you to bring me back some shells
    I said why don't you bring me my shotgun
    Bring me back a pocket full of shells
    You know if I don't get myself some good competition
    There's gonna be some trouble 'round here

  • Come back baby, baby please don't go

    Well I love you, and I want the world to know

    Come back baby

    Let's talk it over

    One more time

    This old world wasn't made in one day

    Come back baby, don't go away

    Come back baby

    Let's talk it over

    One more time

    You know it's been a long time since I saw you smile

    Makes me think of the time you was a child

    Come back baby

    Let's talk it over

    One more time

    If you ain't coming back baby, please let me know

    Then I won't have to worry about you not coming back no more

    Come back baby

    Let's talk it over

    One more time