Chris and I met in '91 after 10 years of not seeing each other. I was doing the homeless --> hippie --> biker thing while he was being an Army officer. We'd been around each other as teenagers, but never really talked. the Freak and the Geek, you know. Anyway, we went out and of course for me, talk turned to music. He asked me if I liked Debbie Gibson. We'd just been talking about mutual friends, so I said, uh I don't remember her. Where'd she go to school? He cracked up, as she was apparently hot on some charts. Then I asked him about the Grateful Dead. He rolled his eyes and said that his best friend from childhood was a deadhead, so at least he knows who Jerry Garcia is. We got married about 5 months later, and a month after that we went to my ex's town to pick up my ferret and see a show. That's when he fell asleep at a sweet little JGB acoustic show.

How's it work? He knows if the music is up loud and I'm dancing in the living room with my eyes closed, it is not the time to ask me about the checkbook issue. and if I want to hold him and sway to Stella Blue, he knows to take it like a lover and just shut up. And he learned early on that no, it's not country music, it doesn't all sound the same, and that Brent was a god. He'll call me at home now (we don't live together because of my job) and will hear Brent wailing in the background: "oh were you and Brent having a moment? should I call you back?"

Chris is the best partner in the entire fucking world.

well....

we do agree about Sugaree and all things Grateful though she would rather hear Roger Daltry sing, more than Jerry or Bobby... she prefers the singing talent of CSNY over the dead's attempts at harmonies... but the jamming is jamming, and life jams away.

but we both left our brains on the 5:15 so long ago. and have both been happily on our own 'dizzy ride' for many years.

finally, for those times when we are grooving to a different drummer...

on the eigth day, God created headphones.

peace.

the serious comment I'd add, is it is all about mutual respect for each other's desires and tastes.

but Hunter's words speak volumes:

"Merry run around
Sailing up and down
Looking for a shove in some direction
Got it from the top
It's nothing you can stop
Lord, you know they made a fine connection

They love each other
Lord, you can see it's true
Lord, you can see it's true
Lord, you can see it's true

He could pass his time
Around some other line
But you know he chose this place beside her
Don't get in the way
There's nothing you can say
Nothing that you need to add or do

It's nothing, they explain
It's like a diesel train
Better not be there when it rolls over
And when that train rolls in
You won't know where it's been
You gotta try to see a little further

Though you'll make a noise
They just can't hear your voice
They're on a dizzy ride and you're cold sober

Hope you will believe what I say is true
Everything I did, I heard it first from you

Heard your news report
You know you're falling short
Pretty soon won't trust you for the weather
When that ship comes in
You won't know where it's been
You got to try to see a little further"

I'm a big GD-Fan since the 70's.
Back in1994 my wife and I made a trip from Germany to California.
One of the main goals for that trip was to see the Dead at CalExpo,Sacramento. I knew, my wife was not that enthusiastic about their music so I convinced her to go to attend least one of the three CalExpo shows with me. So we arranged to see the first show togeher and the other two shows I go myself with friends.
In hopes she might like the live atmoshere in combination with the music, I got tickets for her for all three shows as well. But she didn't know.
After the first night I asked her how she liked the show and she replied, that she enjoyed it very much. Especially the big party, before, during and after the show. Something hard to find in Europe. Up came old memories. So I was aked to get tickets for the other shows, which I already had. Luckily. All shows were sold out. Both we enjoyed a three night party with the greatest music ever played on the planet. Now she shares my love to the GD. But still, she prefers her more mainstream-music.

I listen to the Dead I would say 95% of the time when I am in my truck. My wife always complains that we just heard that song and can we put the radio on . I tell her wait here's were Jerry does this awesome jam. I'll be singing along and say "everybody now" and my son who is six years old starts singing with me. Now my wife is shaking her head because my son and I are both singing.