Grateful Dead

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What free idea said "it's not a downer to listen..." Also it sounds like you got some stuff to get out, and we certainly don't mind listening. Hang in there Chubsib, take it day by day, and perhaps come back here from time to time, where people are kind. Is at least one more guy here who knows first hand what you've been through in Irak. He's still there, so perhaps you can hook up with writing to him here? Peace and inner strength to you Chubsib,and lots and lots of good vibes. ********************************** Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you will still exist, but you have ceased to live. Samuel Clemens

just do what ever you can do keep to your sweet nature it's not a downer to listen to what folks go through, far from it reflecting smiles to you, andy ---'never prank a truster'----

I haven't posted here ever before... used to hang out back in the 90's in a chat called "710 Ashbury", and haven't had the time since about 98', so a lot to say but will try and keep it short... haven't seen a show since Phoenix 94, just kinda faded away after Uncle Jerry went to play that great gig in the sky. Much has happened in my life since then. Kinda drifted in and out of the rainbow family for a few years, then joined the machine and became a heavy equipment operator of all things. That took me out to Reno and into a union and... well I'll save that for later, but, it eventually took me to Iraq working for a company out of Houston called KBR. It is truely amazing for me to look back at it all and see just how far I have strayed from who I really am in the name of the almighty dollar. I spent more time living in a warzone listening to Jerry and Bobby and Phil then I had until rescently since my last show. I'm home now and definitely scrambled in the head. Because I was a civilian contractor, there are no benefits available for counseling, no one will hire me, and I am so deep in debt, I can't even see the sun anymore. I only sleep 2 to 3 hours at a time and only 4 or 5 times a week. I keep my doors locked and have been living my life infront of my computer trying to get out of my head... but, I found a couple of my old cd's cleaning the house the other day and I have been back on the bus. I feel, just from the music, that the hole that war has left in me is slowly, very slowly, starting to close. I've been home for over a year and more than half my friends don't even know I'm home. Honestly, just so I know it myself, I'm not living this way out of fear, more, I feel that this is my pennance of sorts... I have created my own cell... I have nothing but love for all mankind, but the images trapped in my head still won't go away, so, I guess I'm askin for nothin but love... I could really use some good vibes and words of encouragement to know, weather you all agree with war, the war, or anything related to that whole scene, I'm still alive and its never too late. Sorry for the downer. Thanks for reading my vent, and if anyone cares to, feel free to drop me a private message or post a responce. Thanks again and, from what is left of my heart, never let go of the music.Chubs I be.

cookies on the computer johnman? pixel beams for your motherboard!! get well beams for maria!

to all out there who need emPeace, The Kid

so that it all works out 'just exactly perfect' for you all on these paths.Take care The Truth is realized in an instant, the act is practiced step by step.

Really appreciated.... You're awesome! ~ Pappy www.theCAUSEjams.com "Once in a while you can get shown the light in the strangest of places, if you look at it right." - Robert Hunter

Healing computer vibes for Johnmanand Get well healing vibes to Maria *~*Walk in the sunshine, watch for the bright sun, Be all those things you're able to be*~*

...and to all who need 'em. BIG POSITIVE ENERGY coming to all who need it from Pappy in Pittsburgh - especially to my sister-in-law, Maria who had surgery today. ~ Pappy www.theCAUSEjams.com "Once in a while you can get shown the light in the strangest of places, if you look at it right." - Robert Hunter

Let's all send good vibes to johnman's computer, so he can be back with us again soon. Seems as if his has broken down.********************************** Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you will still exist, but you have ceased to live. Samuel Clemens